Limits
I've reached something of a personal limit. Unfortunately there's not much I can do about it at the moment. I'm continuing to catch flak about the change I had to make last week (not voluntarily!) It's all in good fun, but it really is starting to wear on me. I wish I could tell people to cut it out, but I get the feeling it wouldn't be taken the right way if I did.
The project I'm working on is also continuing to cause a lot of stress. I was hoping to be done with it yesterday, but my schedule was utterly wrecked by events I couldn't control. There was an emergency I had to leave the office for, then a meeting I wasn't expecting, half of which I missed because of the emergency. Then another emergency came up and I had a visitor in the lab. There was a spill which involved some electronics, so that needed cleaning up. I wound up staying late, trying to catch up, and couldn't. By the time I left I was causing more harm than good.
All of this has made the TS worse. It's to the point now where I can't maintain any level of control over my tics, so of course that has become a source of jokes. In their defense, most of the people I work with are unaware I have TS, so there's no sense of political correctness where my tics are concerned. I prefer things this way, on the whole, but it's coming back to haunt me this week.
As a result of everything I'm snapping at people and blowing my stack. Luckily I work with a pretty tolerant bunch of people, but even they have limits on what they'll put up with out of me. I just happen to be past mine. Unfortunately until this project is done I really can't afford to take any time off. The deadlines are just too tight. We're scheduling things by what time of day they happen, not by what day they fall on, and the chances of crossing paths and stepping on toes is extremely high. It's stressful.
I'm hoping once this project is done I can take some time off and just go write for a couple of days. It'd do my nerves a world of good. But I don't see it happening any time soon. I got word that I have another emergency project lined up that'll take priority as soon as this project is finished. Such is life, but I can wish otherwise.
-- Pencil
The project I'm working on is also continuing to cause a lot of stress. I was hoping to be done with it yesterday, but my schedule was utterly wrecked by events I couldn't control. There was an emergency I had to leave the office for, then a meeting I wasn't expecting, half of which I missed because of the emergency. Then another emergency came up and I had a visitor in the lab. There was a spill which involved some electronics, so that needed cleaning up. I wound up staying late, trying to catch up, and couldn't. By the time I left I was causing more harm than good.
All of this has made the TS worse. It's to the point now where I can't maintain any level of control over my tics, so of course that has become a source of jokes. In their defense, most of the people I work with are unaware I have TS, so there's no sense of political correctness where my tics are concerned. I prefer things this way, on the whole, but it's coming back to haunt me this week.
As a result of everything I'm snapping at people and blowing my stack. Luckily I work with a pretty tolerant bunch of people, but even they have limits on what they'll put up with out of me. I just happen to be past mine. Unfortunately until this project is done I really can't afford to take any time off. The deadlines are just too tight. We're scheduling things by what time of day they happen, not by what day they fall on, and the chances of crossing paths and stepping on toes is extremely high. It's stressful.
I'm hoping once this project is done I can take some time off and just go write for a couple of days. It'd do my nerves a world of good. But I don't see it happening any time soon. I got word that I have another emergency project lined up that'll take priority as soon as this project is finished. Such is life, but I can wish otherwise.
-- Pencil
posted by pencil at 9:34 AM
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